The road to joy
Relationships are like fire; depending on how you use them, they can build you up or destroy you. If you don't feed them, they'll go out, if you stay too far, you'll get cold, and if you get too close, you'll burn. A relationship needs the measure that will make it work every moment. Everything beautiful in life has a rhythm and a measure, a measure that changes from place to place and from time to time. Our romantic partners reflect the degree of maturity we have as humans. It is like a reverse distorted mirror of ourselves, where we see our inner shadows and our bright spots at the same time. What a partner expresses in his everyday life with his behavior is repressed in the other's unconscious, regardless of whether he has never communicated with it or is not even aware of its existence. Our criticisms of the other are, in fact, the reflections of the elements that are repressed and repressed within us.
It's one thing to "have a relationship" and quite another to "relate and love". The love of "belonging" is not a result of our relationship with the other, but comes from an attitude of our own consciousness; it is a purely internal phenomenon of celebration and bliss with ourselves - it has nothing to do with anyone else. Every journey, every relationship, every action, everything we do in life has one and only purpose: to meet our authentic self. Recognize this truth and stop using up your energy needlessly, for you have as much energy as you need to complete the journey in this life. Learn the art of minimal effort and transform reaction into action. Remember, all that remains, in the end, is the taste of authenticity that you will leave in life, because the exciting journey is the one to self-knowledge and from there to "I am myself". Self-awareness is the condition for someone to be himself, but this does not mean that, if he has self-awareness, he also has the strength to express himself completely in his daily life.
Relationships are lost in the misunderstanding that stems from how each partner interprets reality, which, in turn, is decoded according to the history that each person carries. Thus, we give arbitrary meanings to others' mistakes and ascribe intentions to them, depending on what (we think) their expressions reveal.
Women cannot perceive a man's need for isolation, as this need awakens their own fears of a lack of stability, thus thwarting their desire for a relationship, while men, eternally complaining about their loss of freedom, barely when they get it, they place it in the loft. How many times, because of the lack of sensitivity to the impact that our words can have, we leave irreparable wounds to the other?
How many women or men, searching for the reason for their failures in relationships, did not discover that they unconsciously fell in love with lovers who corresponded to the image of their father or mother? They revived, thus, the expectations and disappointments they had suffered in their childhood, seeking through their reproduction redemption in the hopeless loves of the present.
Let's consider this: that people actually glorify love is something really questionable... They haven't done anything to earn it; it's an instinctive drive that usually promises more pain than joy as lovers repeat the same scenarios constantly, like flawed whirling dervishes.
The truth is that the more you need love to love, the more you idealize it and seek it. And so greater fetters and walls are raised in thy heart. And when we say "heart" we mean a clear and "pragmatic" way of perceiving and acting through the feeling of things, without anything foggy and mystical. Many when saying "heart" actually mean an unbridled emotionalism, which comes, usually, from reflexive stories of their past, through their parental patterns. This is how they become a mass of foggy emotions, influences and addictions that originate mainly from their own mind, disguised as a "heart".
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